Steel Balls

I did a private on deep half guard yesterday. For a split second...one little moment in time...it made sense. I understood my options when rolling my hips either inside or outside. Then, I tried to repeat it back to WrestlerInstructor and it all fell like a house of cards in my mind. I feel like I wasted my time, but I'm hoping it'll come in handy later.

I went into today's group class and decided to start all my rolls from bottom mount, with the expectation that I would have to work my way to deep half and apply what I learned from there. First though, we worked some details on chokes. I've never really thought about "stepping" my way into chokes, so it was a good technique day. It got me feeling a lot better about my chokes too, since my grip feels MUCH less girly than it did when I started.

The mount starting? Not cool, but good practice. I still have a complete disconnect between getting to deep half and the techniques I reviewed in my lesson. The bump is still insanely difficult for me.

Happy moment: starting in such an ugly position prompted one of my favorite blue belts to let me know I had balls of steel...I was honestly flattered.

Public Speaking and Dirty Birds

I'm starting to realize that women and kids really are the canaries in the coal mines of the gym. Issues that may take weeks, months, or even years to manifest themselves on a grand scale show up as ripples in our moods and experiences.

These past two weeks have been awesome. I haven't trained more, but I've gotten to play with my work schedule some, so more morning classes and more privates. Just got back from another morning class with the kickboxing coach. He's the quietest of the group and I would say most relaxed coach at the school, but somehow, in the middle of class, your legs are burning, tendons screaming, chest heaving and you have no idea how you got there. He's there, still chill and you're in pain, still pushing. Tricky. But yeah, today was drill-tastic, which was honestly awesome. I've gotten some good breathing rhythms while drilling and I attribute that all to FlowFit. (It REALLY instills in you how to breathe instinctively through movement.) Drilling isn't terribly exciting, but I love fundamentals. I've gotten to another point in sparring where I just feel like I need to go back to the drawing board and do stuff like today.

But yes...Public speaking. After going through the communications certification program at my school (apparently those of us of the biz-school persuasion are notoriously bad communicators), I'm hyper aware of people's comfort and skill when communicating and leading groups. Sitting in class today it hit me that every BJJ class involves a mini-presentation (from some crazy awkward positions) and then immediate feedback on how well you got your point across THEN little bursts of diagnosis and treatment with each student. I love good teaching.

I've come to admire the fact that the instructors can obey so many of the rules of good public speaking...maintaining eye-contact across the whole audience, good pacing of speech, vocal projection, introductions and wrap-ups...and it's not like the guys in my gym have been doing this for 20 years or anything. Much props.

Sexual joking on the mats and my problem with the full guard...

Full Guard

Oddly, the two areas aren't related...

I was talking with another one of the ladies last night and we started on the topic of sexual joking. I ran across this post on a jiu jitsu forum and it summed it up beautifully. (The poster pops around here sometimes. If you read this, you hit the nail on the head.)

It's a violation of boundaries, a breach of trust. We can press ourselves up against sweaty strangers on the mat. We can let them do things that if they take it a little too far, can result in not being able to walk right for the rest of our lives- or even LOSE our lives via a crushed trachea or something. The only way we can do things like this is if there is a mutual respect of the boundaries; a negotiation of "Safe Space". The violation of a gym's Safe Space is a worse crime than a boob grab. People who do that &$%# need to be booted right out of the school. 


Respect. It's the currency of BJJ. Violation of safety boundaries and violation of respect aren't really that different, and I'd be willing to bet that one feeds off the other. 




Also, while writing this, I realized my big problem with full guard. I have too many options. I get stuck in analysis paralysis and wait to be attacked (not always a bad option, but it's not working for me right now). So, I'm going to pick just two sweeps, two submissions and maybe transitioning to spider/open guard to focus on. I have a feeling that if I don't, the loop's gonna go all infinite.

Diagnosis and Treatment

My last private, I arrived a little early and went a couple rounds before the lesson. When we got started, WrestlerInstructor asked what I had in my notebook to work on, and after I told him, he added two things he noticed I was having issues with.

Posting was #1. I just...don't do it. I fall. No idea why. We did a few rounds starting in a 50/50 position that would require me to post on my hand (not on my elbow as I so love to do) and I have to say, it helped get me comfortable with the habit. Tonight I was posting all over the place!

AND...the triangle from the mount we covered worked BEAUTIFULLY. I really love it. It just feels right. The blue belt I tried it on finished our roll and said "that was your best roll yet" and complimented me specifically on the triangle.

Tee hee, man...tee hee.

My offline journal

My technique journal's been fleshing itself out nicely lately. I use Freemind's mind-mapping software. I chose it because it gives you a flexible way of noting techniques...and, well, I like charts:) They help you see things. It's been especially helpful in finding holes or areas where I've been placing proportionately more attention...or not enough.

It's solved my biggest problem when it comes to journals. I have WAY too many and keeping topics organized can be a hassle. On top of that, I have the bad habit of grabbing the wrong one when I'm in a rush. Little notebooks all over the place. Movement exercises, Spanish, Cooking, Mandarin, Spiritual, BJJ technique, Chinese group...tiny books all over the place. Now, when I learn a new trick to countering defense to armbars from the mount, instead of trying to squeeze information into the margins of that first, tattered page that I created for armbars, I can just go and modify the note on the armbar node.

Koko-puffs

Had another one of those nights where you leave the mats feeling like you have no business rolling...but ya know what? They're common place and distant now. Out of body experiences even.

What stuck out tonight was peoples' reaction. I didn't think I seemed any more tired than I have in the past, but then again, this was the first time in a while I had to crouch from being lightheaded. The brown belt I take privates with complimented me, but I had a hard time making eye-contact (as I always do when I feel I've performed poorly). I made it down the line and sunk down while the last green belt and white belts came by. I felt a hand rest on my head and begin  rubbing it reassuringly. I looked to my right and it was Gorilla, who I'd just rolled with. It was really sweet when I look back at it.

Funny thing...I was sitting watching TV yesterday (which I rarely do) and thought "man...it's been forever since I worked out". I love the jitsu.

I needed a third gorilla reference to round things out...watch the video...it's a classic.