Yes, I trust my instructors to teach me, point out areas of weakness and issues that crop up, but in the back of my mind, I do feel like most men teaching women...especially those where women are in an already taxing environment, are prone to putting heavy emphasis on being encouraging (not that this isn't an essential part of any player's growth). This could all be in my head, but it's there nonetheless. The group I'm talking about has almost nothing invested in making me feel good...teenage boys. I've found they give very honest, no nonsense feedback and aren't too concerned with the feelings of the 30 year old woman that has a hard time with forward rolls.
So it hit me last night, that I don't know any good ways off the bottom of half guard. I get there and have zero options save holding on for dear life and trying to respond after it's passed. So tonight, I cracked open Jiu Jitsu University, confident I'd find some magical sweep to close my half guard hole. What did I find? I found out that I shouldn't be learning magical sweeps to close my half guard hole. I should be working on recovering full guard...great. That concept is rough for me. Sure, it's simple, but my mind has become very forward oriented. Once I'm in half, I start thinking of mount/side guard escapes and then getting to my knees/recovering guard. The idea of "backing up" into a better position just doesn't come naturally yet.