...on multiple levels. First off, I've been off training for about a week now because I've been sick. Considering we've got more visitors at work, it may be another couple of days before I get to spar again. Then, the sickness itself is driving me nuts. Any time I catch a cold, it balloons into sinusitis, which means I can't lie down, not even to sleep. It also means I can't sleep more than three hrs without waking up choking, even with all the meds I've got flowing through my system. I've gone about seven days now without really hitting REM sleep. I'm starting to lose the ability to distinguish between being awake and asleep.
Then there's stress in general. I swear I have PTSD from my first job out of college...any time I even think I might be stressed, it causes me anxiety (which usually turns out to be worse than the stress itself). Being overworked sends me into a nasty cycle even when well. I work more, but feel like I need the same, if not more free time, so I shave off sleep. When I shave off sleep, I don't get to do my morning workouts, or prepare meals like I should, so I start eating badly, working out less and neglecting all kinds of healthful things.
All that said, it's good to know that by Friday, I'll be back at the gym, sweating and working on all the great stuff I learned at my last private.
BUT...things aren't all doom and gloom and craziness. Though I can't handle full on workouts yet, I'm learning that toward the end of being sick, doing some bodyweight work really helps me shake those last bits of a cold. Squat creeps and shin boxes are coming along nicely. I'm really starting to see how the latter helps with your open guard. I can't wait until I get like this guy and manage to stay in one place.
My knees are progressing beautifully if I may say so. Don't get me wrong...they're still crackly, but I don't have pain anymore. No more burning or aching. I can stand from a squat with no pain (and less fear) and my range of motion has increased (in good ways). I mean...yeah...my shoulders have issues now, but BJJ as a whole has done good things for my knees.